DADDY STORIES LIMITED EDITION SALVAGED FROM HOUSEFIRE by Meg McCarville

🔥HEY‼️I BURNT MY OWN HOUSE DOWN JUST TO MAKE THESE LIMITED EDITION COPIES OF MY BOOK DADDY STORIES AVAILABLE TO YOU🔥

🔥Do you ever wonder how lovely lil girls like ME are made?
🔥CAN YOU READ?
🔥DO YOU WANT TO KNOW THE GUT BUSTINGLY TWISTED ORGIN STORY OF A GAL LIKE ME and the death-obsessed, vodka-chugging schemer who made me the woman I am today?!!?!!
🔥The man who taught me that it might be a good idea to one write a book, get a house and then BURN IT TO THE GROUND in order to hock these
🌟HYPER RARE🌟🌈limited edition🌈(only 30 in existence and 12? Available!) SALVAGED copies of my book New York Times Bestselling novel DADDY STORIES available to YOU?!!?!!

🔥ITS YOUR LUCKY DAY‼️
🔥CUZ I managed to salvage 30 copies of my GUTBUSTINGLY BRILLIANT NEW YORK TIMES bestselling novel, DADDY STORIES from what was left of my house!

These copies are COMPLETELY readable even!
Just a bit charred!
Maybe smoke damaged!
Each one unique, like a snowflake!🥹❄️🕊️

This is a ONCE IN A LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY! AS I WILL NEVER HAVE A HOUSE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

🌈As a bonus, you will receive a
SALVAGED☠️NECROCARD☠️A card that you carry in your wallet like an organ donor card, that states that your body can be used for sexual experimentation purposes upon your death. No one should exist without one! Daddy always kept one. I made damned sure his wishes were fufilled post mordem. 😍😍😍 By a GANG OF CRACK WHORES! Not me SICKOS!

🔥SIGNED, DEFACED, NUMBERED, BY ME, AND LIMITED TO 30 COPIES.

Help you help me PAY TO DEMOLISH THIS ALBATROSS THAT COUKD COLLAPSE AT ANY MOMENT AND KILL ME! If you PASS on this, and I get killed when this place inevitably collapsses in on itself, MY BLOOD IS ON YOUR HANDS!🫵🏿🩸🫵🏿
THE TIME IS NOW TO OWN A PIECE OF HISTORY! FOR THE DOORBUSTINGLY LOW PRICE OF $66.66
You can sell it to the goddamned SMITHSONIAN for like As I’m turning my RV into a KILLDOZER and it’s only a matter of time until I skyrocket into infamy FOR GOOD! Or wipe your ass with it. Either way, it’ll be useful!

I’d say you could BURN it but I BEAT YA TO THE PUNCH!😉

SYNOPSIS:

Meg McCarville
Nine-Banded Books, Jun 16, 2024 -
Biography & Autobiography

They say a father is a little girl’s first hero and the standard by which she measures every other man. But what happens when your hero is a grifter and a schemer who treats you more like an accomplice than a princess? And when your hero is a lawless pill-popping prankster who cheats death and hoards guns and chugs vodka by the gallon and howls at every full moon, what happens then? In this darkly comic memoir, Meg McCarville grapples with her “daddy issues” while celebrating the life and legend of the man who taught her everything worth knowing.

“Meg McCarville writes hilarious sentences that often double as sharp gut punches. And when she isn’t punching you, her memoir affects the delightful pain that comes from relieving discomfort—like prodding a mouth ulcer or picking a scab. Daddy Stories is a fabulous scab that I picked at until it was gone. .

—Anita Dalton, author of TL;DR